hesitantapplegal Alright, let's do this:
I've used my ex's Samsung Android phone before, and let's just say it wasn't my fave.
Samsung tweaks the UI A LOT compared to Stock Android/AOSP. Watch a video or two on the interface. Graphene is a lot more tame than Samsung's cartoonish design and doesn't suffer from all the bloat and overload.
I just read Snowden's book and it's freaky to think about how much data big tech companies and the government are collecting.
And that was a good 10 years ago. Imagine what is possible nowadays...
My main hang-up is what I'll be giving up if I switch - namely, iMessage and FaceTime (which are encrypted, right?).
Sorta... iMessage backups are still not encrypted by default and the setting needs to be enabled for iCloud backups. Since you don't use these, no biggie. The chat/call part is end-to-encrypted (according to Apple, nobody can confirm. They might have backdoors for all we know). Giving up on FaceTime will likely be unavoidable, unless your relatives want to send you the invites. You could then FaceTime on your GOS phone through a browser.
iMessage might hurt less, now that RCS is supported by iOS. You would have to use Google's messaging app for that to work and set up Play Services, but you could separate these from your other apps and data via Private Space or a Work profile.
I think what you should do (if undecided) is just get a cheap Pixel used (something that still is supported) like a Pixel 6a for example (they run pretty cheap, haven't checked, but some say around $120-140) and try it out for two or three weeks. If it's not your cup of Gatorade, you can just revert back to iOS. If you find out that you get along, grab a newer Pixel (or stick with the one you have) and enjoy it. This way you're not gonna take much of a loss, since you can sell the Pixel again for roughly the same price.